When people grow older and start their families, their relationships with their siblings usually take the back seat. This doesn’t happen intentionally; it’s just that the demands of raising a family and paying attention to your spouse and career can be overwhelming. This can result in a rift that will require much effort to overcome.
You might want to consider repairing the bond you shared with your siblings or the family you grew up with because such relationships can make your life healthier and happier. You may not know this, but the relationships you had with people while growing up helped develop your awareness of other people’s feelings and thoughts and allowed you to learn ways to manage such emotions.
This article will show you how to maintain a strong and healthy adult relationship with your sibling or loved one while raising your own family.
Avoid Unhealthy Competition and Comparison
Today’s world is driven by competition, and people get distracted by the need to compare themselves with others. It’s natural for you to compare yourself with those you’re close with, such as your friends, colleagues, and siblings. However, if this comparison is an obsessive habit, it may become an overwhelming issue that can lead to low self-acceptance. We all have different choices, so there is no reason to expect your path to be similar to your sibling’s.
Instead of comparing yourself with your family members, shift your thinking to view that comparison as something that inspires you to improve and become a better version of yourself. Your self-esteem should be independent of the success or failure of your sibling or childhood friend. So, avoid using someone else’s life or achievements as a determinant of your inherent value. Focus on setting measurable self-oriented goals.
Let Go of Old Resentments and Keep in Touch
People grow and change, sometimes for the better and other times for the worst. So, don’t assume you know someone based on who you thought they were while growing up. Your parents may have played favorites among you and your siblings, which caused tension in the house while you were growing up. But as adults, you and your sibling can find common ground in your shared experiences and nurture a healthy relationship.
Learn to love and accept your sister or brother for who they are in every stage of their life. This will allow you to be there for them regardless of the circumstances. Of course, you may not agree with each other on everything, but that shouldn’t stop you from having a healthy relationship with them. Be flexible and welcome various versions of each other with open arms. Also, make time to communicate with each other even if you live miles apart.
Support Them Through Challenges Without Losing Yourself
When you talk about addiction, you can easily think of how it affects the person using an addictive substance. However, those struggling with addiction aren’t the only ones impacted by their condition. It affects everyone around them, including friends and family, and causes a strain in relationships.
If your loved one is struggling with addiction, the best thing you can do for them is assist them in getting professional help. They may not like it at first, but when on the path of recovery, they will appreciate what you did for them. According to Verve Behavioral Health, a rehab in Washington DC, “recovery is not an event, but a process that is unique to each individual and their story. You can gradually develop the tools and resilience to navigate that process with passion, purpose, and meaning.”
Avoid being judgmental or blaming your loved one for their actions or behavior. Instead, focus on letting them know how it has affected your closeness with them. Let them know you believe in them and share your feelings about how you’d want to rekindle the beautiful relationship you once had.
Overall
Communicating from a place of love and empathy to your sibling will make them more open to listening to your concerns and getting the help they need. While you are at it, try to set healthy boundaries. Watching your sibling struggle is difficult, and you may want to do everything in your power to save them.
However, you want to avoid enabling them by making constant excuses on their behalf, covering their financial gaps, or drinking alcohol when you are around them. You may think you are helping your addicted family member, but you’re giving them leeway to continue their habit without realizing it. Also, take some time to practice self-care and do the things that bring you Joy. Eat healthy, read a book, or enjoy some time in nature.
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